Most of the time, before 10am I'm bordering the line between a complete caffeine induced nervous breakdowns and delicate retardation rendering me unable to figure out how stairs work. Last week I was the latter, dramatically.
Masked by enormous amounts of coffee, I went about my days being extremely angry and incredibly stupid about exceptionally important things, like seedless grapes.
Proof: I walked out of the house in just my tights, having forgotten to put on my skirt.
I was so clumsy I am now convinced that my ancestry comprises of species with a different number of arms. Like an octopus.
Proof: I was eating a banana when I got an itch on the side of my face. I stuck the banana in my ear. *high five self*