eke is not handling this news very well...
To be fair, neither did I. When I found out that husband had filled my vagina with the filthy semen that will eventually become our child, I was in complete shock.
While husband can take his sweet time getting use to the idea - on account that he has nine months or so to adjust - I, on the other hand, was immediately slapped across the face by mother nature. bitch.
One minute I was blissfully drunk on an island in the Caribbean, the next I was back home peeing on a stick and SPLAT - my life was instantaneously stripped of all the good in the world.
No Alcohol (oh, sweet satan juice how I miss you)
No Soft cheese
No Smoked seafood
No Raw meat
No Deli meat
No anything unpasteurised
I feel like women should get some kind of temporary pregnancy reprieve to experience something of a 'last hoorah'. A zygote-free night, with lots of explosions, minor nudity, pink wine and lots of tuxedos. Then we can go back to being pregnant.
Where is Allie Brosh?